


The Silence

by TenchiKai



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Inspired by "In a Heartbeat", M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-01
Updated: 2017-12-01
Packaged: 2019-02-08 23:01:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12874905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenchiKai/pseuds/TenchiKai
Summary: When his big brown eyes saw flowing silver hair for the first time, his heart started to beat faster, harder. So fiercely it caused him to shake, but he didn’t dare look away. Instead, he clutched his chest to ground himself and opened his eyes wider. His heart pounded away.Inspired by "In a Heartbeat". Happy Birthday, Katsuki Yuuri.





	The Silence

Heart was always silent. Others, he knew, could hear whispers of their heart’s desires; his never made a sound. “Strange,” the doctor repeated casually, one day when his mother asked worriedly. “But not completely out of the ordinary,” he added, to soothe her.

 

The young boy didn’t think about it much, if at all. The most the silence ever bothered him was a snicker from a classmate when asked about it. It was normal, and the kids liked to poke at him about much worse things. It was normal.

 

Until it wasn’t. 

 

When his big brown eyes saw flowing silver hair for the first time, his heart started to beat faster, harder. So fiercely it caused him to shake, but he didn’t dare look away. Instead, he clutched his chest to ground himself and opened his eyes wider. His heart pounded away.

 

In that moment, it was faint, but … it spoke, finally. Like someone whispering in his ear. “Beautiful,” Heart repeated, in sync with each beat. And the boy could do nothing but agree as he tightened his hand around the polyester of his jacket. The ethereal figure danced across the ice. Flew. Crystal blue eyes met brown through the screen and _beat, beat, beat_ went Heart.

 

The boy could do nothing for a moment, totally breathless, like he was the one who just performed on the ice. 

 

“Beautiful,” Heart whispered again.

 

“I wanna dance with him,” the boy said out loud. He didn’t mean for anyone to hear, but his best friend did.

 

“You mean skate on the same ice as him?” She chuckled. “Maybe one day.”

 

There, in that moment, the boy promised himself he’d do just that.

 

\--

 

Heart was loud, had been since he could understand the words it spoke. Its voice was familiar now, and always demanding. “Faster,” it said. “Surprise them!” And he listened, as he always had. Faster, ready and willing to land his first quadruple jump in competition. 

 

And he did. “Listen!” Heart said. And he did. “They love you!” The roar of the crowd fed him, satisfied him more than any dessert. It was enough to make Heart  _ beat, beat, beat _ .

 

Until it didn’t.

 

Heart grew less excited with every gold medal. It happened slowly over the years, but eventually Heart stopped speaking altogether. “Heart?” He’d whisper, seemingly to himself with furrowed brows. “What did I do wrong?”

 

Silence would be the only response. Too much of a good thing can be bad for you, it seems. That didn’t stop him from trying. Every competition, every training day, every interview, he put on his charm and tried to coax his heart to speak. Years passed, and he nearly grew used to it, the silence.

 

One day, in a moment a desperation, alone on the ice, the silence finally became deafening. “Say something!” He screamed to nothing.

 

Finally, a response. “Lonely,” Heart said, barely audible. And that was the last time it spoke. Until.

 

Until it was loud again. Until it pounded in his chest, so fiercely it threatened to leap out.

 

Until he was at one of those boring banquets he’d constantly complained to Yakov about. Until a boy big brown brown eyes and rosy cheeks took his breath away. _ Beat, beat, beat. _

 

Until they danced and nothing mattered by the boy next to him. Nothing mattered. And  _ how did this boy manage to only make sixth? If I was his coach, I’d… _

 

There, and then, in accented English. “Be my coach!” Thump. Thump.  _ Thump _ . It was almost like he could hear the boy’s heart speaking to him. Like they were speaking to each other. “Let’s help each other,” they spoke in rhythm.

 

Heart was loud, heart wanted. Heart craved.

 

But, as quickly as he came, boy was gone. He didn’t even leave his phone number. He and Heart were alone again. That plane flight back home felt like pulling peanut butter from the roof of your mouth. He didn’t want to leave, to move. He wanted to stay in that moment with that boy, forever.

 

Now, more than anything, he wished - wanted - change. Heart was in agreement.

 

But nothing ever changes, so he did what he always did. Skated. Made programs. Though, the entire time he imagined someone else skating them. He imagined someone in his arms, dancing with him. Dancing with him the way boy had done. Heart was sick and silent, considering nothing but the one thing it couldn’t have. 

 

And then, one day while resting, a video. Heart didn’t give him a chance, didn’t let him decide. “We’re going to him!” Heart said. “They need us!”

 

“They?”

 

“He and his Heart.”


End file.
